First grade math and mini lemon bundt cakes: numbers never lie just the person

I've been sliding and sliding down the hillside into the ditch of gluten and sugar.    I didn't think things were such a big deal.   I keep thinking I am committed to eating gluten and sugar free because I know it is so good for me.    I have paid mucho dinero for test results that tell me that gluten and sugar wreck havoc on my body, but I settle.   The cookie here.   A small bag of chips there.   Another cookie to go with the ice cream here.    The old way of eating starts again with a slow roll and picks up speed to becomes a boulder crashing down in a rock slide.   All good, hard earned new habits are smashed.

All this realization started with 6 mini lemon bundt cakes.

 Let me start the scenario.I purchased them for lunch with my friend Joan, her daughter Bella, and my kiddo Abby.    I ate one and so did Bella.    Joan was being good and passed.   Abby took a bite and didn't like it.    To keep up with the math, this leaves me, Miss Sugar Addict, with 3 whole and one partially eaten bundt cake.  

And what do you do when you're left with minis? There's only one thing - and that's eat them!!  They're small and mini.  It seemed so worth it until I was shamed into hiding how many I ate.

Scene:  Me sitting in the kitchen next to empty container.  Abby, my first grader, enters and sits next to me.  
Abby:  What happened to the cakes?  Bella had one.  You had one.  Did you eat mine?   
Me:  Yeah, no one wants to eat after you except for me.   (Pragmatic mom thinking:  Waste not want not - I paid good money for this crack.  I was left with no other choice.  I ate it.)  
Abby:   Where are the other ones?   
Me:   (Are you the bundt cake auditor?)   I ate them.
Abby:   You ate....(starts counting container's empty spaces) you ate 4 more?!
Me:   (This doesn't look so good.)    No, I didn't eat 4 more.   One fell on the ground and it's in the trash.
Abby:  Oh, yuck.   Did you eat the other 3?
Me:  (Why am I starting to sweat?)  No, no, Auntie Joan changed her mind and decided to eat 1.  No, she ate 2.  
Abby:  Oh, that's six.  

Ok.Here I am LYING to my 1st grade math genius because I am ashamed that I surreptitiously scarfed down FOUR mini bundt cakes in one sitting.  (They were pretty good, too.)  I know lying is bad, but what I am really ashamed about is my lack of control even though I know that this stuff is crack and just SOO terrible for me.    Also, the guilt of letting myself down AGAIN is bad.    It's time.  

This is when The Time is here and now.   It's time to kick Miss Gluten-Sugar out.    I know when this witch shows up - when I start lying to my 7 year old, when I start hiding wrappers and containers in the trash from myself because of denial (it ain't just a river in Egypt), and when settling for mediocre and wanting better starts to really wear on me mentally.   And it seems like Miss GS is here E.V.E.R.Y.D.A.Y and has decided to move into my house.    It is time to kick her to the curb.   And that's no lie.