Walk of Shame Pass

Well, I wish I could say that my pastors at church read about our weekly walk of shame on Sunday and wrote me back with this:

Dear Woo Crew,

We read on your blog (what wonderful beginnings for a ministry) about your walk of shame on Sundays and really truly understand your pain. Since Sunday mornings are a challenge to get to church for your family, we focused on this during out weekly staff meeting and thought that we could assist you with several items to make your Sunday morning life much easier.   

1. Visitor Parking - you are more than welcome to park in the most upfront, closest to church visitor parking spot even though you have been a member for the last 5 years. For goodness sakes, take the handicap parking spot if you need to! That request to park off campus in the neighborhood because we are overcrowded doesn't apply to you.  

2. Back Row Reserved - We are just going to go ahead and reserve the back row pew for you. We'll even put a plaque on it with your name. You now have permanent real estate because it IS all about location, location, location.  

3. Donut Run - Since the kids are a little bit tired when they come to church, we'll just leave 3 boxes of donut holes on your pew for them that way you don't have to make the donut run yourself.  

We are just happy that you come to church and love seeing your whole family there. If I could, I'd stop in the middle of my sermon to give you guys a thumbs up just for being there!

No judgment.
Love,
Your church pastors

Sugar Dragons

Avoiding sugar is hard! Like I've said before, sugar is everywhere - like oxygen everywhere!

Not to be insensitive or belittle to anyone with an alcohol or drug addiction - no addiction to overcome is easy - but, I would almost rather be an alcoholic. Yes, it's true. 

This is how I break it down.

Processed sugar exists in practically everything. Read the food labels. Alcohol is not in a majority of my food. My will power is constantly tested with choices during three square meals and snacks during the day. Alcohol is not offered to me this frequently or daily.  

I have to eat something, but I don't have to drink alcohol. A person could go 20-40 days without food - it's scientific, but eventually s/he would need some type of food to live. (Notice I didn't say that I could go for this duration without food. That's just crazy talk.) There's no biological requirement or scientific fact that I have to consume alcohol.

Alcoholics who are trying to recover have group support in Alcoholic Anonymous (AA) meetings. These meetings are all over the the country at many different hours. Year(s) of sobriety are marked with annual celebrations. Sugar-free triumphs are more the quiet, solitary, pat yourself on the back, eat another almond.  

Also, there isn't any particular group that comes to mind when dealing with food issues. However, I recently learned there is an Overeaters Anonymous group, but this isn't something as talked about - probably because a majority of Americans would fit the definition of an overeater. (We are good with denial.)  

An awareness about alcohol exists to warn people about dangers associated with alcohol: Don't drink and drive. Designated driver. There are horrible, tragic and visual stories with impact for discouragement. On the other hand, the nutritionists and dietitians have not convinced the masses about the hazards of sugar with slick slogan campaigns. What would they say? It's Gooder without Sugar. Designated label reader. Sugar Nazi. The impact of sugar is insidiously gradual and hidden for years until a person is dealing with diabesity and health problems. There are no 'sugar' wrecks to show devastating, instantaneous impacts.

Finally, people recognize alcoholism as a problem and are more sensitive to it. MOST people don't push alcohol on you if they know you are an alcoholic - they will try to have alternatives for you at a social function or just not have it. Sugar is a different beast. I go to dinner with friends and make some comment that I am sugar free. Most reactions are range from "Ha! good luck" to "You're a freak," then, the question: You're not going to make me eat this piece of cake ALONE are you? Here have a bite. 

The Sugar Dragons are always out there.

Our Sunday A-game

After writing about the walk of shame and arriving at church late every Sunday, I was on my A-game the next Saturday night. Everything has prepared and preplanned so nothing could go wrong.   And everything went right -  except the unexpected.

It started with my dog's fur lying oddly on one side his face. Glenn guessed that Buck had hives. He didn't quite look like those dogs on google so we googled some more. By the time we thought we should give him some benadryl just in case, he looked like this. Eyes and jowls swollen. Bumps all over his face and body. Poor guy kept scratching and rubbing his face with his paws and rolling all over the carpet to scratch his back.

When I left for Petco to get emergency supplies, Buck was pathetically lying in Glenn's office with Glenn scratching his face.   

And that is why we didn't go to church this Sunday. The dog ate our Sunday A-game.